Enlargement of the soul

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During this season, I’ve been praying for more detachment from worldly things and more attachment to things that matter— love, art, music, and God— but I did not expect it to be so literal this morning!
 
I was already in a hurry to get to the labor and delivery floor for morning sign-out, but when I found my car, there— dangling on the door— was my driver side mirror. “What. Really? Really! Why me? Why now?” I rolled my eyes. I looked at my watch, took a breath, let myself feel that frustration, then ran back to get some tape. I patched it up and drove off.
 
On my way to the hospital, I thought: “Man, things break.”— My car breaks. My body breaks. Things break. During my residency training, I’ve seen dozens of people breaking, even to death—

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As I thought about my silly little mirror, I remembered this book I’m reading, “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality.” It has been rocking my world because I am learning about emotions and how God uses them in me to love Him more. Pain and loss are not things to run away from. When Job experienced catastrophic loss what did he do? He shouted at God, he prayed wild prayers, he told God exactly what he was feeling.
 
“Limits are behind all loss. We cannot do or be anything we want. God has placed enormous limits around even the most gifted of us. Why? To keep us grounded, to keep us humble… Grief and loss enlarge your soul.”
 
It is truly a miraculous and mysterious thing for brokenness to give life. A small broken mirror kept me humble this morning— and for that small enlargement of my soul today, I will say I am blessed. ‪#‎blessed‬
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